Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Slightly smoky with a hint of beer...

I love Trader Joes.
They have so many interesting foods to try
and there are very few of their items that I've tried and didn't like.

But today....

This is their chicken fried rice.
(It's not a very good picture, but that's okay 'cause it wasn't very good food.)

It's one of those frozen bags of food, just plop it in the skillet and be done, 
so I'm pretty sure that I didn't do anything to screw it up.

As I was stirring, the thought of beer popped into my mind.
"Why," I asked myself, "am I thinking about beer?  I don't even like beer."

Thought dismissed... move on.

Stir, stir... 
A conversation I had with a friend about smoking cigarettes pops into my mind.
I don't smoke, she used to...

The rice smelled funny, but it also smelled familiar, so I leaned in.
It smelled like my grandmother's house did when I was growing up!
Slightly smoky with the slight tang of beer.
(Yeah, I know... all of your grandmother's houses smelt like cookies and pie, whatever...)

That's weird... so I smelled it again, and again.
Then I put some on my plate thinking that maybe it would taste different,
but no...
it pretty much tasted like my grandmother's house.

Which, no matter how much I love my grandmother, should not be how my food tastes... ever!

So consider this a public service announcement:
Don't eat Trader Joe's Chicken Fried Rice.

***************************************************************

Dear Mom and any other relatives that might read this,

I in no way intended to insult Grandma here. 
She is a classy lady who just happened to live in the 50's and 60's 
and smoked cigarettes just like everyone else.
(So very Mad Men of her.)
But maybe you could not tell her about this particular post.

Thanks!

13 comments:

Bunch of Barrons said...

This cracked me up, but sorry about your rice!

Susan said...

LOL, that is just too funny! I love the disclaimer as well. (My great great grandmother smoked cigars and traded goods with Native Americans, oh how the times have changed.) Thanks for the smile.

Grammie/Mom said...

Reading this at work had me laughing out loud!! How well I remember that smell and I'm not going to tell!

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Too funny! And I totally know what you mean.

Brooke said...

Isn't it funny how smell and, in this case: taste, can bring back such vivid memories. But YUCK... that certainly doesn't sound very appetizing ;D

Kelley said...

Smoky beer chicken fried rice?? Mmmmm!!!!!

(Runs to the bathroom to throw up)

Linda R. said...

Note taken... No fried rice from Trader Joes.. Got it!! What a funny post!! Thanks so much for giving me a laugh this morning..

Hugs, Linda

Leslie said...

oh my goodness this made me laugh so hard!!! i think i am glad that i don't remember that smelll!

T.J. said...

The first time I had currents directly off the vine, I immediately thought they tasted like a clambake.

Similar to your experience, but um, not really. Maybe try couscous next time, or will that remind you of a distant aunt? ;)

Jess said...

I'm sitting here scrolling through my google reader, catching up on the last few DAYS. You win. Hands down!

Love this! :D

amatterofhowyouseeit.com said...

Oh no! The photos looks delicious though.

Alita said...

Your sense of humor always makes me smile.

Hey- I have never had trader joes food. Am I really missing out? Tell me your favorite.

Elizabeth said...

HAHAH! This post was hilarious Colleen! I like the little side note about how yeah i know all ur grandmas houses smelled like cookies and pie lol. LOVE YOU!